09 February 2015

Upside Down Sizing

At one point late last week I had a 4 bedroom house in the happiest place on earth, Orlando, Florida.  It was a nice two story home, with a swimming pool and game room, new appliances and two large oak trees out front and a fertile rose bush whose yellow roses bloomed 40 or more … Read more
23 January 2015

The Target of Your Defection

I was a bit nervous this morning. I had been tasked with adding two SQL instances back into a master/target (MSX/TSX) relationship so that they would receive updated job code that had a new DFS share backup maintenance plans. Why was I nervous? Well, nervous might not be the right word. I was challenged because … Read more
24 October 2014

Setting Expectations and New Carpet

We have been doing upgrades to our house recently and on a recent morning over coffee I told my wife how funny I thought it would be if we hired a crew to come install carpet in our bedroom but did not move all the furniture out first. And evil thought, yes, imagining the carpet … Read more
11 October 2014

Wonder Twins at PASS Summit 2014

It is Saturday afternoon in Orlando and as I type this, my wife, Karla,  is in St Louis attending SQL Saturday #333.   I have just finished my HoneyDo list and have been thinking about the upcoming PASS Summit 2014 in Seattle and all of the great memories there. I could tell you about the time … Read more
07 November 2013

Crime Scene Investigation: SQL Server

“The packages are running slower in Prod than they are in Dev” My week began with this simple declaration from one of our lead BI developers, quickly followed by an emailed spreadsheet demonstrating that, over 5 executions, an extensive ETL process was running average 630 seconds faster on Dev than on Prod. The situation needed … Read more
12 August 2013


On Saturday July 27 2013, 10:37 AM EST, I was sitting with a small clan of DBAs at the SQL Saturday in Cocoa Beach, Florida (you know, the place where actual rocket scientists live and work). A colleague had a serious issue with his laptop, on which was critical information for the event. Somehow, inexplicably, … Read more
28 March 2013

Dear Microsoft Access: I Love You

Five weeks ago, I was on a phone call talking about problems our users were having with an MS Access application. Up until this point in my career, I had successfully fended off “database” questions or issues in MS Access because I was not an MS Access expert. Now though, on this call, put together … Read more
31 January 2013

From DBA to Data Professional and back again

One of my periodic tasks in the department I lead, “IT Data Services”, is to produce summary reports on the current state of my team’s projects, as well as statistics on our SQL Server infrastructure. For efficiency, I normally just write a quick query to pull the data from my DBA repository database, throw the … Read more
03 January 2013

2013 and the Impossible Challenge

I am consistently amazed when I read on twitter the exploits of DBAs who compete in marathons, endure triathlons, or simply run every single day. For me: impossible. The furthest I have ever run in one go was 3 miles. I was 9 years old, barefoot, and being chased by a Doberman. Older now, and … Read more
08 September 2012

Disaster Recovery Discovery

Last weekend I joined several of my IT staff on a mission to perform a DR test in our remote CoLo center in a large South East city of the US. Can I be more obtuse? The goal was simple for me as the sole DBA in a throng of Windows, Storage, Network and SAN … Read more
21 March 2011

MVP Trading Cards and War Games

I had planned to blog tonight about the MVP Summit and all of the great new friends I met, mostly XNA and Direct X MVPs for some reason, but I could not wrap my brain around how I would deliver the idea I had without offending nearly every SQL MVP I know, plus a few … Read more

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